DRANKIN'

  I know drinking does not pertain to food or travel.  But when you do it with the Sheltons its always an adventure!  When you live on Okinawa its difficult to go to bars that aren't full of military guys.  And by military guys I mean marine meat heads and young airmen who aren't even allowed to drink in the states.  So this last Saturday we were celebrating my husbands birthday.  After going to a brand new sushi restaurant with our friends , we decided to continue on to a few bars.  The game plan was the same as it always is so there shouldn't have been any surprises. Or so I thought.  Apparently, there were a few notices that went out about bar accessories.  There are a few new accessories that been put into play since I started going out. And Im pretty sure I will never take part. 
   Now ladies, I know we all like to dress up, and pick out some cute accessories to wear.  But apparently, the new bar time apparel lends nothing to the imagination.  Which brings me to the first two accessories of the evening. And these two will definitely not be making an appearance in my repertoire.  Beer guts and cellulite ass.  I mean really, if you your shorts and so short that you can see the cellulite in the bottom part of your cheeks, you should have thought of a different outfit. Not to mention that it was only 65 degrees out.  Thats part one. Part two is becoming an increasing problem in my eyes.  I think AFN needs to make a new public service announcement.  Do some friggen situps!   If you can hold your stomach like a pregnant lady with one hand and continue to smoke a butt with the other, I think you need a workout coach.  No one needs to see your fat gut jiggle as you pretend the seizure like movements you are making is dancing.  I also cant forget to mention the girl who was ordering her drink, and apparently she got tired. So she rested her gut on the bar while her drink was being made.  Does that not scream take me home or what.   
   That was only the beginning of the night.  It got even worse from there.  I would have thought it was kind of funny if someone had a flava flav clock on or an eye patch.  But no, people are extra creative these days.  Apparently I missed the memo about bring your pet to the bar night.  There were dogs at every bar we went to. And Im not talking little purse puppies. I talking huge dogs.  Then some idiot walked in with his snake.  Yep, some douche had his snake wrapped around him at the bar.  He obviously needed a leg up in the game department because the girls with the jacked up teeth seemed to just love him!  I mean really why would anyone bring a snake into a bar.  Did I mention the little purse that was attached to his side.  At first I thought it was food for that disgusting reptile, but no. He never fed it.  Im pretty sure it was his money purse.  It looked like an fanny pack from the 1500s.  Im not sure where the art of drinking is going, but I dont like it!